She'll Cut You

Blonde and Sassy were having gay date night on Wednesday so I invited myself. I got a text midafternoon from Blonde asking what time I would be free and if I liked Japanese. I told her I was free all the time (no, really, if anyone wants me for anything, I'm completely available!) and I love Japanese. She texted back that she'd make reservations. Really? Sounded fancy! But no, she wanted to make sure we would get a booth with a sliding door.

We went to Thai Show and the hostess was less than happy to greet us. She sat us in a booth and snapped at us for drink orders. When she left, the girls told me that she sometimes is a little attitudey but the food is good. I was like, I'm so gonna get yelled at when I order.

We got Sapporo and they downed the edamame while I tried to figure out what to eat. The menu is huge. I finally decided on one of their box meals. They offer Box A, Box C, and Box D (no one knows what happened to B, and I wasn't about to ask). The one I got came with five sashimi pieces but didn't say what kind.

So when I ordered I flipped the sashimi menu and the woman was like, No No chef decide. So I was like, ok that's even better so I don't have to choose. She answered, Chef choice chef choice no yellowtail. I said again, that's fine, even better. She said, Chef choice. I said, yes I got that. Then I cowered, fearing the wrath of the Japanese lady who could've ended my life with her pen most likely.

When she walked away, Sassy and Blonde were like, Oh my God she so yelled at you. I was like, told ya.

The food, as promised, was delish. It was also way too much. It came with soup and salad. The Boxes all came with California rolls and rice and two appetizers. I finished almost the whole thing. So did they.

We went back to Blonde's. They drank. I ate three cookies over the course of the next few hours. During that time, Fitz the dog climbed up into my lap and groped my boob. Now if only he were human.