Mia and Christina Watch Zack and Miri Make A Porno

Graphic. I'm a little disturbed still and it's been two days. I'm also still a bit turned on. I saw penis. I saw boobs. I saw fecal matter. Kevin Smith does not hide from bodily functions. He basks in them.

Elizabeth Banks as the want-to-be-screwed-by-the-jock-who-never-loved-me Miri is the perfect pairing for Seth Rogan's who-gives-a-shit-I-have-a-beard-and-I'm-chubby Zack. The storyline: girl and guy remain friends throughout school and move in together as adults and see each other as siblings and can't get their financial shit together so they decide to sleep together and film it to make some quick cash but that cash may not be worth the sibling bond they may lose between them. Believable, no?

What is believable is Jason Mewes who is completely naked and, I hate to say it, sexy when he's completely naked. He plays Lester, this sexual machine who gets erect on a moment's notice. He shows his penis. I have a feeling he walks around naked off screen a whole lot, and it's probably not the first time these people have seen his penis, and the entire cast and crew probably saw a whole lot of it while he dropped trow constantly. It's a guess, but I'd be willing to bet on it.

I somehow did not recognize Tracy Lords as Bubbles until I saw her name in the credits. Here's a woman who actually did porn. And then Melrose Place.

I don't know what I expected when I figured I'd go see a movie about making a porno. I don't know why I didn't expect a whole lot of simulated sex, mostly doggie style, and then some rounds of making out followed by a deluge of shit. Here, shit is literal. That's the disturbing part. Mia and I both hunched in our seats and let out audible sounds of bleck. I'll say no more. I don't want to ruin the horror the horror for you.

To make up for the horror the horror, Mia and I grabbed some burgers at Ruby Tuesdays and then headed to Steve and Barry's and Old Navy, where I racked up a wardrobe to stave off a cold winter. While there, Mia realized that everything she bought at Old Navy last week is now on sale. That always happens.

The flick was funny, no doubt. I mean, Seth Rogan, Jason Mewes, Kevin Smith, oh, and Craig Robinson who has killer timing--those guys are all funny in their own right. Put em together and it's guaranteed comedy. With porno in the title, it's also guaranteed naked.